Going crazy is right up there on the list of all the fears people hold deeply, my Butterfly.
It’s no secret that anxiety can make you question your sanity.
Social anxiety affects your very ability to perceive the world.
The dizziness, the heart shakes, the churning stomach, the headaches that grip the base of your skull like a vice.
Your body takes over with it’s fear response and you are left feeling like a mere spectator, wondering what anxiety will throw at you next.
That’s if you even believe it’s anxiety – it’s such a sneaky beast that it has you believing that you are actually sick with something terrible when it throws all of those symptoms out there.
Fighting anxiety is absolutely a waste of your time – it will just make you tired.
As an energy healer, I see it all the time:
It’s like pushing against a brick wall. You push, anxiety will resist with exactly the same amount of force.
You will get nowhere.
And it’s the tiredness that compounds the grip that anxiety has on your life.
When you are tired, your body’s ability to function normally is impaired.
And you perceive the world through a tired and anxious lens.
It’s a crazy-making combination.
And when you put something like insomnia on top of it…
It’s the trifecta.
Or so you feel.
And of course, your feelings are how you sense and interpret the world.
So if you feel crazy, then that is how you are feeling at that time.
But it’s not permanent, my Butterfly.
It’s important that you know that as well.
Why? The blunt truth of the matter is: People who are actually going “crazy” usually can’t see it for themselves.
And people who feel like they are “going crazy” really aren’t – it’s the fear that drives the fear.
It’s the difference between neurosis and psychosis.
Neurosis = you think you’re crazy but you’re not
Psychosis = you think you’re not crazy but you are.
So it’s safe to say that if you feel like you’re on the edge of going crazy, if you feel like one more added pressure will push you so close and right over the edge, you need to stop.
Understand: You are tired.
You are anxious.
You need to be gentle to yourself.
You need a break.
You need to rest.
And it’s also useful to note that – because anxiety is such a horrible fucking beast, your anxiety symptoms are very convincing, so you can be persuaded to second-guess and triple-guess this advice.
You’ll get some sort of weird and wonderful new symptoms that will make you question every value you hold about the world.
Every belief you have.
Numbness. Tingling. Mouth pain. Blurred vision. Chest pain.
Reactions your body is throwing out there in an effort to get you to stop whatever you’re doing to trigger this deep-seated fear response.
And it’s amazing what your subconscious mind will register as a threat, to get the fear response.
Even things that you used to find pleasurable, like going for a walk of meeting a friend for a coffee can be turned into a panic-inducing ordeal.
The thing with anxiety is, it’s so damn convincing in the moment.
Anxiety rides in and takes over the entire show – the problem is, you don’t see that at the time.
All you see is the world looking at you as if you’re going crazy while you are also questioning your sanity as you feel yourself being pulled into the swirling, oppressive sinkhole of anxiety.
The thought is there in the back of your mind: “What if I don’t come back from this? What if this reality is permanent? What if that one extra thing happens, that pushes me over the edge, and I never recover?”
You can feel desperately isolated and alone – trapped in your misery because nobody – NOBODY – understands what it feels like to be trapped in this place.
(In reality – over a billion people anywhere in the world at any given time are feeling exactly what you are feeling right now – it’s just the fact that anxiety has this knack of isolating people in their pain because our society values rampant positivity even when it’s silently suffocating us).
Anxiety feels permanent. Especially when it moves into your life and begins to take over.
It’s the unwelcome guest who takes all of your energy and leaves a trail of emotional destruction in its wake.
It’s true that it’s very difficult to tell the difference between actual reality and anxiety/panic thoughts and feelings while your anxiety is at a peak.
The little things that you would usually not even notice suddenly become big signposts of worry.
You cling to whatever “evidence” you can find to prove that your anxiety is right.
When you experience the world through your heart, and ‘feel’ life on a daily basis, it is truly debilitating when the feeling faculty is not working properly so the way you sense the world is overblown.
Please be reassured that you’re not alone in this, my Butterfly: And take whatever steps you can to get a reality check and from that, form a pillar of truth that you can hold onto.
What do I mean by that?
Face whatever it is that you are fearing.
Shopping, giving a presentation, health concerns – whatever it is that has triggered your anxiety spike, locate it and name it.
If you can’t pinpoint what’s triggered the spike, or if you’ve been held prisoner by anxiety for so long that it’s such a concrete pillar of your life:
Think back to when you first started feeling this way.
Do you remember what else was going on in your life at this time?
If not, that’s ok.
Can you think back to how you first felt when anxiety moved in?
Don’t worry about making your anxiety worse – you are in control of this exercise.
Once you can locate and pinpoint what first made you feel anxious, or remember that first initial feeling of fear and overwhelm, you are a good deal of the way towards isolating and neutralising your anxiety – energetically.
So yes – it is very possible to recover from anxiety, no matter how bad it is.
I say this all the time.
Once you’ve identified that first trigger point, you can then take the power away from it.
After you have names the trigger, you have effectively isolated it (yes – even if it still feels super-real and super-painful).
Your natural desire will be to try and push away this trigger, or effectively remove it out of your life somehow.
My Butterfly: Pushing anxiety away never works.
Like – never, ever.
If pushing away your anxiety worked, then you wouldn’t be reading this blog post.
You would have successfully won over your anxiety.
The battle wouldn’t have been there in the first place.
In fact, I would even go as far as to say that the REASON WHY you’re even here reading this article is precisely because you have been trying to push anxiety away in one way or another.
Fighting with – and pushing away – anxiety, is a lose/lose situation.
You’ll only make yourself more tired and exhausted.
Because when you push and fight, you are actually engaging with the anxiety.
You are feeding it.
You are making it stronger.
Fighting is what anxiety wants.
Anxiety wants a tired mind, and a tired body to live in.
STOP FIGHTING YOUR ANXIETY – YOU WILL NEVER WIN.
Sorry for shouting.
I had to make my point.
Instead of fighting, here’s what you should do:
Make room for it.
Exercise: Making extra room in your mind:
Feel the anxiety in your mind.
And in your mind’s eye, put white light around the anxiety.
Lots of white light.
Flood your brain with beautiful, pure white light.
Remember, white light is a renewable resource – the more you use, the more gets made by the Universe.
Allow that white light to soak into your brain.
Let it get to every part of your brain – every part of your mind.
Allow the white light to soak into each and every brain cell, filling each cell up to make it plump and juicy, allowing the white light to continue expanding so it permeates beyond the walls of every cell and radiates outwards.
The white light expands from every brain cell to form an aura around those cells – an aura of white light and space.
This white light continues to expand.
Continues to create more white light and space around every single brain cell in your head.
You are amazed that so much light and space could be created in your brain, but more is simply created.
Each brain cell is cradled in a pool of white light – pure, gentle, healing love.
And still, the white light expands.
It expands outwards, in every direction, until you feel the difference in your shoulders.
Your shoulders feel as if they are being lovingly embraced by a warm, healing hand of strength and love.
You feel strength and power melting into your shoulders.
Every cell in your shoulders accepts and welcomes this wonderful white light energy as it expands and makes even more room – more room for love. More room for life.
Soon, your heart chakra feels the warm and expanding energy as it activates and opens up.
Your heart pours out increasing love energy, which becomes one with the white light and makes it even stronger in its peaceful healing power.
Without trying, you allow the white light into your heart chakra. Allowing space for wholeness and healing.
Feeling that love, and expansion – feeling incredibly powerful within yourself, and still this beautiful, healing white light energy grows and expands from your heart.
When you are ready, open your eyes and return to the here and now.
My Butterfly, I want to end this blog post by saying: When you are feeling overwhelmed, like all your thoughts are piling in – one on top of the other, when you feel like you have LITERALLY NO ROOM in your mind or your life to take some time out – this is exactly when you need to take time-out.
So – please do make the time to do the above exercise at least twice a day for a week.
And you will begin to notice amazing shifts in your life. At first slowly, and then with increasing strength and impact as you allow them to happen.
You may feel like you’re going crazy – but you’re really not.
The key is to give yourself some space. Some healing, white-light space.
Love + light
PS – It’s so important to ground yourself when you feel like you’re off-centre with that going crazy feeling. I have a FREE grounding MP3 meditation that I know you’ll love. Get it here.
PPS – If you liked this week’s blog post, you’ll love last week’s: What IS friendship between women?